Kids These Days

So here’s a dilemma for parents of teenage daughters. You thought their cold looks and brusque behavior were just them going through “that phase.” Maybe not. A new study suggests it could be ‘roid rage you’re witnessing.

At the highest rates ever, 5 percent of high school girls and 7 percent in middle school have tried steroids. What’s craziest is why: to build muscle and lose weight. Guess they’re not thinking much about the other side effects: deepening voice, flat chest and facial hair! It’s not surprising these are the same girls with body image problems and eating disorders.

The real question is where these kids are finding them. Steroids are now controlled substances, requiring a prescription to get them—all except one: DHEA. Thanks to some politics from Utah Senator Orrin Hatch, DHEA received exemption despite being banned by NFL, NBA and the Olympics. Do I even need to mention that Utah is a major player in the diet supplement industry?

Now Major League Baseball, which has not forbidden DHEA, is pointing the finger at Congress in D.C. hearings regarding juiced players, asking how it can control something the Congress doesn’t ban (hmm… the NFL and NBA managed to do it…). Too bad MLB makes about as much effort as Cracker Jack prizes.

Finally, anyone else find it weird that when you search for DHEA in The New York Times, which first covered the chemical’s exclusion from controlled substance lists, ads to purchase DHEA come up? Just $13.95 for 180 capsules. So if I’m in a temper this week…